What True Love Means To Me - Blogger's Edition 2

On Friday, I told you all what true love meant to me, which you can read here.

At the beginning of the month, I posed the question to my readers, "What does true love mean to you", and asked anyone who wanted to take part to write a paragraph or two on the subject.

Thank you to everyone who responded. The answers I received were brilliant, they all had different angles and perspectives and I discovered aspects of love I had never even considered. I love hearing what others think of topics that I write about.

The first of your answers where posted yesterday, have a look here if you missed it. Here are the second lot of answers :)

@youbabymemummy from You Baby Me Mummy
True love is having someone that is the other half of you, simple as that

@dementedjan from Rambles, Rants and Writings

Being asked what true love means to me was a tough question, because it’s hard to describe.  My partner and I are very close and I like to think that it’s true love (but don’t we all). 

For me true love is made of several components and for me the main five are: love, trust, respect, care, and consideration that you show one another.  Love is something that I don’t think you have any control over and it means everything to you.  It’s something that would leave a hole if it wasn’t there and you couldn’t be yourself if you didn’t have it.  As well as the above I always think honesty plays an important factor too – you have to be able to be honest with each other and talk to each other about anything.

True love is slightly different because to me it means that the other person shows you the same love, trust, respect, care and consideration in return and would also not be themselves without you.  Its real love, not one sided (for instance I know people who think they love someone but the other doesn’t return the five elements I mention: love, respect, trust, care, consideration) and it’s true to you and true to the person you feel it for. 

It doesn’t even have to be perfect, just honest and works both ways.  I used my partner as an example but I don’t think you are limited there, as I like to think it is true love I have with my children, my Mum and my sister too! 

 

@NottingHillDaddy

Love. Such a Universal entity and yet a totally subjective word.

I am fortunate enough to have experienced it, but would be foolish to attempt explaining the true meaning of love.

How many words can fill up an ocean of emotion that you feel for someone?

It's misery, it's joy, it's an apple. 

Let's put all the words of every language in a blender and make a smoothie.

It's impossible to explain the true meaning of love!

But there is a test for it.

To know if you truly love someone, imagine you are both at the edge of a cliff.

One of you has to jump and you have to choose which one.

If your answer is yourself, congratulations, you are truly in love with that person.

 

@RunJumpScrap from Run Jump Scrap

If we are talking about love for partners, true love to me is not having to pretend with someone. You can be you and not fear being judged and know your crazy idiosyncrasies are accepted. True love is having a lover (which some may not agree but I do think sex is a reasonable part of a successful relationship!) and a best friend, someone you would do anything for and someone you can trust and rely on completely.

 

@Daysinbed from Days in Bed

After having 3 serious relationships i can now see what true love really is. love is being kind, patient, understanding, overlooking one another's faults, wanting to spend time together, missing one another when your apart for a long time, caring for one another when you are sick. True love is my husband who has never said something to hurt or upset me, never beat me or caused emotional suffering. He is my true love.

 

@Fortheloveto from For The Love To

I also believe that true love grow with time and it gets stronger as you get older... True love is support each other through good and bad, it not only being a couple but also being partners, best friends, great companions.

 

@thirstydaddy from Thirsty Daddy

True Love isn't words, but it isn't actions either. It is about motivation. It’s about selflessness and sacrifice. True love is looking at somebody and realizing that there is nothing that you wouldn't do to make this person happy. True love is when you realize that your happiness is now tied to how this person feels. It’s not an emotion, it's a transformation. It's the moment you look at your child for the first time. It’s when you look at the person you are with and realize everything is different now.

 

@Mrs_Tubbs from Someplace Strange

True love is about committing each day to loving that person, putting them first and then, waking up the next day and doing it all again. Whatever the circumstances.

 

 

Thank you again to everyone who took part.

Do you agree? Let me know in the comments :)

You can find me here: Twitter Bloglovin Pinterest and Instagram Please do stop by and say hi!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



What True Love Means To Me - Blogger's Edition 1

Yesterday, I told you all what true love meant to me, which you can read here.

At the beginning of the month, I posed the question to my readers, "What does true love mean to you", and asked anyone who wanted to take part to write a paragraph or two on the subject.

Thank you to everyone who responded. The answers I received were brilliant, they all had different angles and perspectives and I discovered aspects of love I had never even considered. I love hearing what others think of topics that I write about.

Here are the first of your answers :)



@poothead from Poot's Notes
I used to not believe that true love existed, and that there was only lust. I have changed my idea as I have gotten older. I think that the love for your husband/wife can be true. It feels like the world would end without them, and that they would do anything for you no matter what it is. Someone that can sweep you off your feet, someone that you can tell anything to, and be yourself with. If you can find someone to accept you and all your issues, then they are a keeper. :) Now true love with your children is another issue entirely. It is a different type of love, one that never ends, one where you would do anything for your kids no matter what, a love that is so sweet and serious but loving and fun all at the same time. The love where you cry if they are hurt and are mad if someone tries to hurt them. A love where you would take their pain for them, or die for them. I think you can love your siblings and parents like that too, one where the love will never end no matter what and you would do anything for them. And your pets too. We love them just like we do our family because they are family too. :)

 

@adropofindigo from A Drop of Indigo

I think true love is mostly about being yourself, about feeling like you belong but feeling free at the same time. It's someone that makes you laugh every day and that gets your silly jokes. Someone that shares your lowest times, but also inspires you to be better than you could have imagined. You know...like chocolate...but a person :)

@hardluckhero from David Lucio
Real love should shake you to your core, both when you find it and when you lose it. It shouldn't ever be replaceable. Instead, that love will stay with you for all time... even if the person doesn't.
Real love should hurt as much as it heals, because it's a double-edged sword. And you shouldn't be able to just choose who you love and who you don't; real love isn't a choice.
This is an extract from this post, check it out!

 

@PoopRainbowMama from My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows

To me love is when someone can put up with you indefinitely, faults and all. Someone who still wants to spend time with you after they've heard all your stories and jokes. Someone you can't wait to tell when something good, bad or funny happens to you. Someone you can't picture living without. Someone worth fighting through the hard times for.

 

@RockinRandomMom from Rockin' Random Mom

True love is the love I have for my children. My definition of true love is that undefinable and overwhelming love that I feel for my children and I know it will never go away. When it comes to romantic love, I'm a bit jaded and don't really put a lot of stock in it so the term True love doesn't sit right with me. But if I was to believe in romantic love being true, I prefer real love, or genuine love. It doesn't sound as catchy as true love but it sounds more real, at least to me, and real love is accepting the other person completely, and they accept you, flaws and all. Being with a person who brings out the very best in you and you bring out the best in that person, is something that happens naturally. That person becomes your best friend, your biggest fan, and your equal. You "get" each other. That's what I'll be looking for when I am ready to put myself back out there anyway.

 

@honestmummy from Honest Mum

True love is unconditional, it's a love that grows freely and daily-and overcomes adversity/ obstacles, I feel that with my husband, Peter (he is the ying to my yang) and of course kids- true love shouldn't be restricted to sexual love only, it can apply to your family.

 

@WhatKatySaidUK from What Katy Said

True love for me that feeling that you cannot bear to be apart from that person. That you are a part of them and they are a part of you. I feel that love for my children, I felt it from the moment they were born. I feel it for my husband too, I think I am lucky that I married my best friend, my one true soul mate and so he is a part of me too. Whether it is my husband or my children there is no pretence, they know me and I know them. Love can be blind but true love is seeing someone with your eyes wide open.

 

@Jenoir_84 from Jenny on a Plate

For me, true love is being accepted for who you truly are, and being able to do the same for the person - or people - in your life that you truly love. This applies not only to your partner but your family and friends. True love is seeing who one another really is, behind all of the facades that we all inevitably put up, and accepting and forgiving the mistakes that that person makes.

 

Thank you again to everyone who took part. Check back in again tomorrow for part 2!

 

Do you agree? Let me know in the comments :)

 

You can find me here: Twitter Bloglovin Pinterest and Instagram Please do stop by and say hi!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


 

What True Love Means To Me

What does true love mean to me? I think true love is hard to define as one single thing, so I have compiled a list of all the things true love means to me:

* Trust
* Honesty
* Loyalty
* Understanding each other
* Mutual respect
* Amazing sex
* Goosebumps and butterflies
* Knowing someone is always in your corner
* Growing old together
* Putting that person before yourself
* Compromise
* Being yourself with no fear of rejection or judgement
* Accepting someone exactly as they are and not trying to change them
* Feeling empty when they are not around
* Looking to the future and always seeing them by your side
* Wondering how you ever felt whole before you met them
* Giving someone the power to break your heart, and hoping they won't
* Being able to tell someone anything
* Stability

The list is in particular order, and is by no means exhaustive, but those are what come to my mind when I think about true love.

I think true love is when the first flush of excitement and newness wears away. The person is now a constant in your life. The best behaviour mode has slipped, you've seen each other at your best and at your worst and you still want to be with each other.

You feel like that person is your best friend, your soul mate, someone you can't imagine living without.

You would walk through fire for them, move the world for them.

When they touch you, you feel alive.

When they aren't around, you feel like a part of you is missing. They are truly your other half - the yin to your yang, the cheese to your pickle, the gin to your tonic.

They make you laugh, cry, and want to dance for joy.

Even at their worst, you know you wouldn't be without them, and at their best you feel like the luckiest person in the world to have them in your life.

You would never let them go, and together, you can beat any odds.

And I can't resist sharing one of my favourite quotes. Although jokey, I think it says a lot about accepting people when they are at their worst as well as their best, and that's what loving someone is really all about.

Check back tomorrow and Sunday for the "What true love means to me, bloggers edition" where other bloggers (and some non-bloggers) have shared their thoughts on what true love means to them!

What do you think? Let me know in the comments :)

You can find me here: Twitter Bloglovin Pinterest and Instagram Please do stop by and say hi!

 

The End Of A Relationship: Moving On

Originally, this post was going to be ways to cure a broken heart. There are many schools of thought on this, ranging from have a good cry, burn their possessions, get horribly drunk, or move on to the next person. I don't believe any of those are the cure, they are merely something to fill the time until your heart heals. Because the simple truth is this. The only cure for a broken heart is time.

Over time, you will find yourself thinking of the person less and less, and when they do pop into your head, you might even smile at the memory rather than feel pain. When that happens, you are probably cured.

There are hundreds of books, magazine articles and songs dedicated to curing broken hearts. Can it really be that simple? Just wait it out? I think so.

Put on your "boy done me wrong" playlist, eat ice cream, scream and cry, whatever you want to do in the moment, but know that it will pass.

It might feel like your world has ended. It hasn't. One part of it has ended, but that's all. In time, you will find ways to fill the gap the relationship left, you will probably come to realise it was for the best. After all, if it was meant to be, it wouldn't have ended.

Here are three ways to fill the time and move on:

1. Career

Have you been thinking about going for a promotion? Changing careers altogether? Throw yourself into it. Use the extra time to research what skills you will need. Now complete relevant training, and offer assistance with projects that will help you build up the skills.

2. Hobby

Have you always wanted to write a book, paint, learn a new craft? Now is the time. Lose yourself in something you enjoy.

3. Travel

If you've always wanted to travel, then now could be the time. If money is what's stopping you, look into a working holiday.

Those all sound better than moping about over a failed relationship right?

If you don't want to commit to something big, why not just spend time with friends. Fill your spare time with fun activities. Laugh. Remember though, if some of your friends are mutual friends, it is unfair to put them in the middle. Just because your ex has broken your heart doesn't mean he/she is a bad friend. Don't make your friends chose sides. If you really need a good bitch about your ex, bitch to your non-mutual friends.

Now, turn off the done me wrong playlist, and play your "moving on" playlist. Think Cheryl's I Don't Care, Destiny's Child's Independent Woman, and Alanis Morissette's You Oughta Know. Turn the volume up, put on a slick of lippy and show the world you aren't broken!

What's your go to cure for a broken heart? Let me know in the comments :)

You can find me here: Twitter Bloglovin Pinterest and Instagram Please do stop by and say hi!

Is A Relationship Ever Worth Fighting For?

People say if a relationship is worth having then you must be willing to stand up and fight for it.
I'm not sure I agree with this. Surely if the relationship really is meant to be, it wouldn't be a fight? I'm not suggesting that as soon as it gets a bit tough you just give up. What I am saying is that if a relationship feels like a constant fight, then maybe it's just not meant to be.
I think it depends on who you are fighting.
I quite like the idea of two people united, fighting the haters, the judgemental douchebags and the negative people of the world. Showing the world that love really does conquer all and nothing can come between them. That is a fight worth having.
I don't think a relationship should be a constant fight between the two people in it. Maybe it's just the wording, because I do believe in working on a relationship. Not taking each other for granted, making time for each other and so on. I also believe in compromise. No one should be "in charge" you're partners and as such, you have to have give and take.
It's normal to fight sometimes, and it often takes one of you to stand up and say we are worth it, we are good together, and we can rise above this issue.
If that is happening nearly everyday, especially if it's the same person who always gives in, then that always makes me think it's not meant to be and you're trying to force it.
Ultimately, I think when you are in a relationship, both partners should be happy. If you are not happy, then in my opinion, it isn't worth fighting for. If you are happy and its other people trying to drag you apart, then it is worth fighting for.
I think occasionally fighting for the relationship strengthens it. It shows you are invested in the other person and won't give up on them. If it is an everyday battle then I think it probably isn't meant to be and fighting for it is just drawing out the inevitable.
I think the worst scenario, is when one of you is so sure the other is "the one" you will do anything to keep them. You constantly fight for the relationship, often losing a part of yourself to adapt to the other person's needs. If this is completely one sided, then to me, that person was never the one. The one, your one true soul mate, whatever you want to call it, would feel the same about you, so you wouldn't be constantly fighting for the relationship to work, because there wouldn't be any reason to fight for it if both parties were invested in making it work.

What do you think? If you have to fight for a relationship, does that mean its forced, or does it just add to the strength of it?

You can find me here: Twitter Bloglovin Pinterest and Instagram Please do stop by and say hi!

What Does True Love Mean To You?

I plan to do a post towards the end of the month about what true love means to me. I was thinking that it would be fun to see what love means to everyone else as well.
Love means so many different things to so many different people, so I would like to pose this question:

What does true love mean to you?

I plan to put together a post (or 2 depending on how many people respond) of everyone's thoughts on this.
I am looking for a paragraph or two detailing your thoughts on this. You can leave it in the comments section, or you can email me.
Please include your response, your name (or a name you would like to be referred to by), your blog link and your Twitter @ name.
If you wish to remain anonymous, that's fine, just let me know in your comment or email.
If you don't have a blog, or don't wish to include it, that's ok too, but you may as well get some free publicity!
Your Twitter name is just so I can let you know when it's live and won't be published on the blog unless you use it as your name.
Please get any submissions to me by midnight on Sunday 20th September.
I look forward to reading everyone's thoughts!

You can find me here: Twitter Bloglovin Pinterest and Instagram Please do stop by and say hi!

September Theme Reveal

I can't believe it's September already, this year is flying by. But September it is, so time to reveal the theme for this month, which will be Love, Sex and Relationships.
Coming up this month will be my take on various love, sex and relationship themed topics, plus all your monthly favourites. Check in on the 6th for your chance to have your say!
As always, I am looking for guest posts for this month. Got something to get off your chest? An opinion to share? Your true love story? Anything love, sex or relationship themed will be welcome. Check here for more details and how to submit a post.
I'm really excited about this theme. When first considered it, I was in two minds whether or not I would be able to find enough to talk about to fill a month, or whether to go for a two week theme. When I really thought it through, I realised, like most things, I actually have a lot to say :)
If you have anything in particular you would like me to write about this month, don't be shy, let me know either in the comments, or via email.

You can find me here: Twitter Bloglovin Pinterest and Instagram Please do stop by and say hi!

Five Reasons I Love Blogging!

Often people ask why bloggers blog. Well why do we? I can't speak for everyone, but here are five of the reasons I blog:



1. Blogging is like free therapy - you can get anything and everything off your chest, you can write about something that has left you broken, sad and you might find the writing process helps some.

2. Blogging is a fantastic way to share your ideas and opinions with the world! - I love having this little space to talk about my thoughts and opinions on anything and everything, and to share the things that make me happy, the things that make angry and the things I love!

3. I just love it - I originally started my blog to help me find my voice as a writer. Perhaps this is the wrong reason for starting a blog (are there any wrong reasons?), but I fell in love with blogging and I now see it as so much more than a stepping stone. Blogging itself has become the end goal. I still very much want to write a novel, but I still want to blog too. I also learned the two are very different in terms of voice. On here, what you see is what you get - I write in my own voice and I stay honest and true to myself. When writing fiction, I write in a character's voice, and that character may well have very different thoughts than I would have!

4. I love hitting milestones and goals - I guess you could say I'm a little competitive that way. I don't try to compete with other bloggers, not only is that pointless, but I believe as bloggers, we should be helping each other, not trying to outdo each other.
I love the element of competing with myself for want of a better term. I like setting goals for myself and achieving them, and my blog allows me to do that. I'm also a bit of a stats geek (I didn't know that about myself until I started blogging), and although I don't let myself get too hung up on stats, I still enjoy looking at them and comparing them month on month.

5. I love the community feel - Prior to starting my blog, I imagined bloggers to be very competitive with one another, and I thought there would be a lot of back stabbing. I couldn't have been more wrong! The blogging community is amazing - everyone is so friendly and welcomes new comers with open arms, often giving help and advice where needed. I have made a lot of new friends through blogging, and stupid as it sounds, I feel like they get me on levels my IRL friends don't.

Are you a blogger? What do you love about it? Let me know inn the comments :)

You can find me here: Twitter Bloglovin Pinterest and Instagram Please do stop by and say hi!

N Is For Need Vs Want

Day 14 of my A to Z Challenge. N is for Need Vs Want.

If you don't know how this works, I've posted the link back to the rules of the challenge at the end of this, along with a link to yesterday's post. If you want to read my full alphabet, just keep following the links. Each day has a link back to yesterday's post.

I remember when I was a teenager. I was upset about splitting up from a boyfriend, and was talking to my mam about it. She said something that has stuck with me ever since.
She said "In life, you will meet lots of people who you could live with. Find the one you can't live without".
I'm still looking for him, but I really don't think I'll ever find that sort of intense relationship. It terrifies me to think I could be that reliant on someone else. That if for whatever reason he left, my life would be in tatters. I like to think I am independent, responsible for my own happiness and needing someone else would put paid to that notion.
I think though, that this fear sometimes holds me back. If I meet someone who I think I could come to feel that way about, I tend to run a mile.
Its something I'm working on, and hopefully one day I will be able to give in and truly need someone, rather than merely want them around. Wanting someone is great, but I think needing them is the real deal.
Its a risk I think we have to learn to take to fully appreciate love. Yes, you might get hurt, but on the other hand it could be the best thing that's ever happened to you. You have to be all in, and if you do get hurt, pick up the pieces, and move on.
As Shakespeare said (I think it was Shakespeare): Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all!

Follow me on Twitter @randommusings29 and feel free to comment :)


Link to rules:

http://myrandommusings.blogspot.co.uk/2015/04/a-z-challenge-whos-with-me.html

Link to M Is For My A To Z Of Me: http://myrandommusings.blogspot.co.uk/2015/05/m-is-for-my-to-z-of-me.html
 

Love At First Sight

I don't believe in love at first sight. Does that make me logical, or unromantic or both?
It's impossible to love someone who you have just seen. You don't know them or anything about them.
I believe in being in love with the idea of love at first sight. Let's be honest, its a nice idea. It makes for a much nicer story than "our eyes locked and I thought hmmmm he's not bad looking, then casually continued on with my life". Its better dinner party conversation to say I saw him and knew I loved him than to say I saw him and wanted him. 
I understand why people do believe in it. You love him now and can't remember a time when you didn't, so you call it love at first sight.
You look back to when you first met. You remember that butterfly feeling you got when he first looked at you, first spoke to you, first touched you. And you casually forget that you had those same feelings with countless other men, but didn't come to love them.
I believe in lust at first sight. The power of attraction is strong and could be mistaken for love, but then you get to know him as a person, realise you have nothing in common, he doesn't treat you as you want to be treated or one of a million other reasons and you move on. The next time it happens you do the same. And again. Maybe even again. Then you find the one, and that initial attraction genuinely does become love so you tell yourself you always loved him. It doesn't mean you actually did.

Do you believe in love at first sight?

Follow me on Twitter @randommusings29 and feel free to comment :)

Is Love Enough? 17th April 2015

Is love enough? In short, it should be. But is it?
When you get down to it, if you truly 100% love each other, of course it's enough. It's better than enough. It's perfect and amazing and you wouldn't change it for the world. It's like a movie, all blazing passion, kissing in the rain and beating the odds together.
In reality, people let things like money problems get in the way. Or pointless arguments, like she can't stand his snoring and he hates the way she chews. It makes me wonder then if these couples were ever truly in love. Perhaps the question that we should be asking is "is this love?"
Surely, real true love beats any odds. If you are truly in love, yes the little things still annoy you, but its not that big a deal. If money is short, it's not so bad because you are in it together. If you go on holiday and get the hotel from hell, it doesn't seem so bad because you're there together. You can face anything together. Geography doesn't matter, you can live anywhere as long as you're both there. Problems don't seem as big because you help each other through it. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks because you only need your partner.
Love is the greatest and most powerful thing in the world. Stronger than money, career, material things. Better than anything else you can think of.
Yes, love is enough for me.

Follow me on Twitter @randommusings29 and feel free to comment :)

Messages From Beyond The Grave 18th March 2015

I read an article recently asking if you found out you were dying, which five people would you leave messages for and what would they say?
This was easy for me. Straight away I knew exactly who the five people would be. I think it would be harder if I had children - who would I bump from the list? It would be next to impossible for anyone with more than five children.
The five people I would send them to would be my mam, my dad and my three best friends. I would tell them all how much I loved them, thank them for everything we've shared and tell them not to be sad that I'm no longer around.
I would thank my mam and dad for everything - giving me life, raising me well, always being there and loving me unconditionally.
The first of the three friends, I would tell her that she's funny and loveable and deserves a good man who will treat her right. I would tell her to treasure every moment with her new baby and make memories.
The next I would tell she is the strongest woman I have ever met. She copes with more than I ever could and she is an inspiration.
The third, I would tell him he's the man by whom I compared anyone I ever dated and that none of them ever measured up. I would ask why we never gave it a go, and I would tell him not to change for anyone.
The article went on to say send those messages now (minus the part were you tell them you're dying/dead presumably). Let the people who matter most to you know now.
I didn't send the messages. I think it would worry people if they started getting slushy messages off me for no reason. Also, I really think the people I would send them to know how important they are to me.
Maybe I will send a diluted version telling them how much they mean to me but in a slightly less melodramatic fashion.
On one hand, I think the idea of leaving something behind for people to read is lovely. On the other hand, I wonder if it wouldn't just upset people. Would sending these messages be more for me than them?
What does anyone else think? Do we tell the people we love that we love them often enough?


Follow me on Twitter @randommusings29 and feel free to comment :)